請幫我找乙個150字左右的英文小笑話，最好有中文翻譯。

i wasn't asleep

when a group of women got on the car, every seat was already occupied. the conductor noticed a man who seemed to be asleep, and fearing he might miss his stop, he nudged him and said: "wake up, sir!

i wasn't asleep," the man answered.

not asleep? but you had your eyes closed."

i know. i just hate to look at ladies standing up beside me in a crowded car."

我沒有睡著。

當一群婦女上車時，車上的所有座位都坐滿了。 售票員注意到乙個男人似乎睡著了，他擔心他會坐得太久，於是用胳膊肘輕輕碰了碰他，說：“先生，醒醒！ ”

沒睡著？ 但是你的眼睛是閉著的，不是嗎？ ”

我知道我只是不想看到一位女士在擁擠的汽車裡站在我旁邊。 ”

he is really somebody-- my uncle has 1000 men under him.

he is really somebody. what does he do?

a maintenance man in a cemetery.

他真是個大人物。

我叔叔手下有1000人。

他真是個大人物。 為什麼？

墓地守護者。

stan: i won 92 goldfish.

fred: where are you going to keep them?

stan: in the bathroom 。

fred: but what will you do when you want to take a bath?

stan: blindfold them!

斯坦：我贏了92條金魚。

弗雷德：你想把它們放在哪裡？

Stan Stan：浴室。

弗雷德：但是當你想洗澡的時候，你會怎麼做？

斯坦：蒙住他們的眼睛。

WS敵友 2007-10-17 10：24 報道.

two attorneys went into a restaurant and ordered two drinks. then they brought out sandwiches from their briefcases and started to eat. the owner marched over and told them, "you can't eat your own sandwiches here!

the attorneys looked at each other, shrugged their shoulders and then exchanged sandwiches.

兩個抄寫員走進一家餐館，要了兩杯飲料，從包裡拿出三明治開始吃飯。 餐館的老闆走過來警告說：“你不能在這裡吃自己的三明治。 ”

兩位律師面面相覷，聳了聳肩，交換了三明治。

one day,a little boy asked his father,“baidad,how much does it cost to get married?”father replied,“i don't know,son,i am still paying.有一天，小男孩問他的父親：

爸爸，結婚要多少錢？ “他爸爸回去了

回答說：“兒子，我不知道版本，哇，我還在付錢。 ”